Co-Parenting and Taking Vacations

My title is intentional. 

How does a single mom of two amazing young boys emotionally afford to go on a beautiful European Vacation for almost 2 weeks? (11 days to be exact.)

Mykonos, Greece

She chose the best father to have children with.  I have often been outspoken, and will admit, my 

ex husband and I have not always seen eye to eye on how we managed our personal relationship.  Our personalities are very polarized. 

He is regimented, he is a doer, an overachiever, 

he gets his power in life through his wisdom and sharing that insight with others.  He wrote a column for local newspapers called, "The Man in The Middle, " his perspective, on the middle road of controversial political issues. 

I, on the other hand, live life through my instincts. I lead by my energy and my heart.  I thrive off of socializing and taking care of those around me.  My inner voice guides my decisions and I always want to feel a sense of peace and well being in all that I do.  I write about feelings and experiences. 

The thing about failed relationships is, there was something that attracted you to this person in the beginning.  

There is always a positive reason why two people came together in love.  

For me and my ex it was the intellectual stimulation.  I had finally found someone who was smart enough to challenge me. Unfortunately, those challenges became our demise.  

On the upside, our intellect helps us see the bigger picture in raising our two boys.  We always aligned on parenting and we are still aligned.  It makes being divorced easier when we are both in sync on how we love and care for our children.

We are good parents and our boys know they are loved. 

I can leave the country for 11 days and not worry about their well being.  I can be relaxed knowing they are being taken care of and that they are thriving.  This is the difference between co parenting and something other than co parenting.

Ask these questions after your divorce. 

Are your children in safe hands?
Is there trust between you and your ex?
Is there understanding?
Is there respect?

These are always the goals.

The romantic relationship is over.
The parenting relationship is forever.

Work on creating the best co parenting relationship possible.  If it becomes difficult, see a parent coordinator or go to therapy.  

If conflict is unusually difficult, see a a high conflict parenting counselor. 

Let go of the past and move forward with a clean slate.  Move forward with purpose in order to be better for the children. 

In my personal situation, our children have always been our glue and kept us married long after we needed to be divorced.  We are proud of our sons.  This is something we will always agree on and I am certain they will keep us bound for life.  

For us, co parenting came naturally, our life for our children trumped all other conflict.

For others, it may take work.  Do the work, your children will love you for it.  It will make taking a break from it all that much more rewarding. 

Venice, Italy