Mean Girls

For those who didn't read my blog last week, it was entitled "Haters." Definitely check it out.

This week, I felt the urge to do a follow up called "Mean Girls" and really get down to the nitty gritty. 

Most of us have seen the movie Mean Girls.  It's funny and it makes some really good points about how petty girls can be in High School. 

We all have experienced 'Mean Girl' wrath.  We all have been that 'Mean Girl' at least once in our lives.

We all have secretly wished that girl would get hit by a bus.  

(LOL)

Mean girls operate out of fear.  There is a place in their heart that is void of compassion,  void of human decency, a place that hurts so deeply they lash out. 

They put others down to try and make themselves feel better about themselves.  They are motivated by a place within that feels they are not good enough.  They are driven by a place of self loathing. 

I have had my moments of being mean as a child.  I recall this story:

I was at a family function at a restaurant.  I was probably 10 or 11 sitting at the 'kid's' table.  My cousin and I began teasing the token fat kid.  A few other kids were laughing.  I proceeded to make an entire story about a chocolate chip cookie.  How the cookie was the world, the crumbs were people, and the fat kid was a chocolate chip. 

Terrible. I know.  

My cousin and I thought we were being funny, as we cracked up laughing over my childish anology.  We were young, we didn't realize we were hurting someone else's feelings, ultimately it was about making the other kids laugh.  

The boy went crying to his mother.  His feelings were really hurt.  

I was young and stupid and misunderstood the magnitude of our words.  We got in big trouble after the fact, by my aunt.  Which is why I probably remember the ordeal so clearly. 

The kid grew up, got skinner, and probably will recall that moment in his life as poignant. It certainly was for me. 

Kids can be mean. We don't think about how our words can harm.  However, I believe when we are bullied as kids it builds resilience and character.  I know this, because as a kid, I was picked on a lot.  I was an easy target.  

I also believe, experiencing kid meanness is different than Mean Girl madness.  

Kids who bully are misguided, while grown girls or older women, who are mean, are just mad.

They are angry.  At themselves, at their ex, or their life situation.  They hate, so therefore they are mean. 

I believe they are the meanest of people.  Those with no remorse, no empathy, no understanding of the consequences of their actions, solely and they simply want to see someone else hurt.  They want those they lash out at to hurt more than themselves. 

Sometimes people misinterpret my actions for mean.  This is a true fallacy.  I am extremely thoughtful in everything I do.  I posses empathy and I care for everyone in my life who is close to me.

Those who know me, understand my true intent. 

There are times we need to make a statement, there are times we need to stand up for others, and there are times we need our voices heard.  For ourselves and for those who matter to us.

Doing nothing is worse than doing something that may be construed as insensitive or even cruel.

There are times when reaching outside traditional boundaries is important.  

It is different than being angry and mean and hurtful on purpose, solely to temporarily feel better about ourselves. 

Usually, Mean Girls are obvious. You can spot them a mile away. They have a bitchy way about them.  You can sense their judgments, their thoughts are stuck in poor motives.  You can feel their negatively.  You see it on their resting bitch face.  You hear it in their negative words.  The words that flow out of their mouth, like a lizard tongue.  They watch others and find ways to bring them down.   

They will grow to have more wrinkles and age poorly.  That negativity is like a disease that takes over their entire body and it soon ages them years prematurely. 

Mean girls (women) are everywhere.   Remember, mind your thoughts, mind your words, mind your intent.  Do not be that girl who hates and lashes out.  Be the warm, caring person that God intended. 

Never blame others for your life circumstances, you always have a choice to make a change.

Are you Happy and content with your life?

Or are you upset, unsettled, in the mist of chaos, struggling to get through each day?  

That is the difference between a warm heart and a cold one.  

Warm soothes the soul. Cold holds the heart stagnant.  It prevents growth and opportunity to be loved sincerely.