Life Agreements

Occasionally we cross paths with people and our time together is short lived. 

Other times a long term friendship blossoms.

The short lived friendships, tend to be superficial or fullfill a specific need at that time.  Every so often I run into these old friends and I'm genuinely glad to see them, but I am reminded why we didn't stay friends for a longer period of time.  Something often triggers within, how they greet me or how they choose their carefully, crafted words.  

I roll with it, mainly because I know we all have our own journeys to explore.  And, no matter what my role was in their life, I gave when I needed to give.  I am sure I took what I needed as well.  

Isn't that all relationships are, a dynamic of give and take?

Finding the perfect balance is always the secret to the best relationships.  The longest lasting ones do not form conditions, they are fair and sincere.  

Some relationships work based on negotiations.  I'll do for you, only if you do for me.  Tit for tat.  This can work as long as both people are agreeable and satisfied with unspoken agreements.

We make agreements with ourselves all the time.  It is only natural to make non verbal agreements with the people in our lives.

What happens when the agreement no longer serve us?  They no longer fullfill a need.

Do we make new agreements or does the relationship fall apart?  

Think about that.

A wedding ceremony is a formal agreement.  I will love and honor and cherish you for the rest of our lives. Through sickness and health,  richer or poor. 

How often is this agreement, those formal vows, broken?  

It makes no difference how those chosen vows are created, the words can be changed,  but it is the commitment that crumbles.  

How often do we break commitments for someone or something better?

When is the commitment belittled?  

When are people consistently true to their word?  

Our word is really all we have.  No one can take it, no one can act on our word, we are solely responsible for what we choose to say and how say it.  If we change our mind, we have the choice to be honest about our change of heart.  

That's how we keep the agreements in life our authentic.  

Who are the people you trust the most and why?  

Who is loyal? 

Who will always tell you the truth?  

Why do we value these people the most?  

Often it is not about the nature of our relationships, or why we choose some over others, it is our ability to keep our word, our commitment, our ability to maintain our authentic selves.

We must first keep our personal agreements with who we are within in order to keep our most authentic external agreements.  

Give and take is then effortless and we are never left feeling uncomfortable.  

Be comfortable with all your life agreements.  Be honest with the whys and you will never be left feeling alone.